There is often times a lot of pressure and expectation placed on the area of texting a girl after attaining the holy number. The notion of text game being a ‘thing’ is everywhere. Many pick-up ‘gurus’ make an entire living just from selling products revolving around the bullshit idea that you must text girls a lot, and properly…all the time.
In my opinion, this is not the case, as in many situations; texting can do more harm than good, especially if you have yet to meet the chosen lady for your first date. Many guys will completely burn a girl out over text messages, to the point where she loses interest very quickly.
How it usually works is the guy approaches her, and asks all the ‘right’ questions, eventually ‘winning’ the number. Once he leaves the girl the thought process of “when do I text her?” begins to kick off. This is where he might invest in the poorly offered advice of clueless pick up artists who dish out techniques such as “wait 72 hours and 45 seconds before texting her so you can demonstrate higher value and non-neediness.”
This is a cunning ploy to come across like the guy who is all busy and shit. Instead, why not focus on getting your shit together and ACTUALLY having your days surrounded by the passions you love.
In essence, the number should be seen as nothing more than an extension of the already flowing interaction you have just left, which should be completely in alignment with your healthy intentions, which she has been made aware of, either by the vibe, or by you verbally stating so.
I only ever take the number if we have already established a fairly secure future get-together.
Side note: I never ask for it…I simply hand her my phone mid conversation. They never ask why, they just take it and put their number in. Simple. You can’t be rejected on something you did not ask for.
Ok, lets get back on track.
How long should you wait to text a girl? If you are asking yourself that question, then you already want to text her…so do it. Who gives a fuck? Seriously!
If you are afraid of coming across as needy, then you have most likely already done so in non-verbal cues and body language. The very fact “I hope I’m not being needy” is in your head, states that you are in alignment with that behavior and mindset already.
The easiest way to deal with this is to behave as a man would, and own that shit!
If all you want to do is text her because the interaction went amazing, maybe you felt a connection and you are excited…HOW IS THAT A BAD THING?
Stop trying to be super alpha.
Understand that modern day projections of ‘alpha-ness’ are actually the quintessential behaviors of deep-rooted insecurities.
Owning your desires and intentions are as ‘alpha’ as you can get, if that’s what you want to be. Who cares though, just do you!
Own your excitement and desire, which the girl has instilled in you. Enjoy it.
In terms of texting…I text when I want. You should too. For doing otherwise is in direct correlation with feeling you are not truly worthy of her, so you must adapt the behavior of how you assume a better man would behave.
Sometimes, I will text her the second I am walking away from her, and in other cases, if my day is busy, I may actually forget about it for a day or 2. Either way, it is natural and organic to me, and how I am feeling as an individual man. I make my own rules, you should too.
I’ll say it again…
OWN YOUR SHIT!
The content of my texting is not pre-canned routines, or silly ‘I’m better than you’ stories. It is completely in alignment with how the interaction was when we met.
If I was goofy, then the texts will be goofy, light and flirty. If I was in a rush and super serious in order to quickly get her contact details and get back to my day, then I will ask her to tell me a few things about her…but that is it! No more!
· Do not saturate her with lots of texts (you will become less mysterious and much more boring to her after increased text exposure)
· Do not ask her loads of personal questions (save them for the date so you can connect in person much stronger)
· Do not put pressure on her i.e. forcing her to meet you. Simply state it. Ex: “right, we should grab a drink on Thursday so we can talk about baby giraffes in person”
I keep my texting the same way as the interactions; light, flirty, sexy and playful, with hints of curiosity (saving all the sexual tension and connection for in person).
You should avoid being the guy who asks her random questions like “hey, what’s up” or “how are you”, at the beginning of every day. I mean, if that’s what you want to do, then sure, go for it, but its pretty obvious you are both stalling on pulling the trigger for a meet-up, or you are incredibly bored, as you have nothing going on in your day.
Side note: This kind of texting is fine if you are dating the girl already, as it is similar to how you would text a good friend, with genuine interest.
Stop pussyfooting around and arrange to meet her, where the real magic can happen.
You do not need text game. You simply need to be clear of your intentions, and don’t be pushy.
Pushy = Need to control = Fear. It is NOT confidence.
Girls want to be around a guy who is easy to be around. Remember that.
Stop taking this and yourself so seriously, and you will do awesome. Girls will want to meet up with you first.
Usually I just send girls ridiculous pictures of animals wearing swimsuits, why? Because I find it hilarious, and if she does too…then we are going to have an AWESOME time.
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